


dave's panties

by hupsoonheng



Series: Nuclearstuck [10]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, Crossdressing, Lingerie, M/M, Rimming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-21
Updated: 2013-02-21
Packaged: 2017-11-30 01:09:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/693619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hupsoonheng/pseuds/hupsoonheng
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Ah, yeah, that’s what the color department or whatever the fuck at Victoria’s Secret were thinking, now I fucking understand. ‘What’s gonna be the hottest trend this year, Stevenson?’ ‘Oh I don’t know, Smith, what about this perfect shade of purple?’ ‘Great, fucking great! We’ll call it Gamzee Purple and it’ll sell like fucking hotcakes.”</p><p>(in which gamzee discovers he likes boys in panties, or at least dave in panties)</p>
            </blockquote>





	dave's panties

**Author's Note:**

> for breezy, mostly, but also for me because who doesnt like boys in panties? just a quick oneshot to tide everybody over until the next chapter of other ongoing nukestuck fics

It starts with the little pink bags. You find them discarded in the apartment every so often, tiny striped paper bags with a bunch of pink tissue paper stuffed inside and nothing else. You ask Dave what the hell is going on, but he gives you a characteristic long-winded non-answer every time. When you actually look at one of them it’s stamped with the words VICTORIA’S SECRET and you think you know what that is. A not-so-quick search on your hellbeast Dell (which is definitely ready to go) confirms your suspicions. 

But you still don’t know why these bags keep popping up—until one particular Tuesday night you both have off from the club where Dave got you hired as a really fucking effective bouncer. Dave is reading some book about the history of photography, wearing this dinky pair of folding reading glasses from Duane Reade, legs propped on your lap while you watch Loiter Squad. Or well, he’s sort of reading, because he keeps glancing at the screen and pretending like he’s too good for this show. When you point out that he’s totally watching it, though, he huffs and turns over to present his back to the screen. 

He hates wearing his belt at home, and this particular pair of skinnies is old and stretched out—which is hilarious when he walks around the house in them, constantly doing the hike-up dance—so when he shifts, they fall a few good inches down his ass, and suddenly you’re met with bright purple cotton and narrow lavender lace peeking out from under the worn black twill. 

“The fuck is that?” you ask, tugging at the side of his waistband to get a better look. 

“My underwear, you freak-ass piece of clowny shit,” Dave snaps as he tries to pull his pants back up. “I know you know what underwear is, even if you don’t like wearing it.” 

“That ain’t your usual fuckin’ underwear,” you say as you slap his hand away. “That’s my goddamn blood color.” 

“Ah, yeah, that’s what the color department or whatever the fuck at Victoria’s Secret were thinking, now I fucking understand. ‘What’s gonna be the hottest trend this year, Stevenson?’ ‘Oh I don’t know, Smith, what about this perfect shade of purple?’ ‘Great, fucking great! We’ll call it Gamzee Purple and it’ll sell like fucking hotcakes.” He doesn’t try to stop you anymore, but he does make a big show of paying acute attention to his book, even though watching his eyes you can see he’s reading the same line over and over again. 

“So lemme see ’em if it’s not a big deal like that,” you say as you flip his hips to face up and pull them a little closer your way. Dave tries real hard to keep his upper half turned toward the back of the couch, but when you yank on him he ends up on his back and he just splats his book over his face in defeat. “Maybe I need your granny glasses to be seein’ ’em, though,” you snicker, and he almost throws the book at your head before he thinks better of it and puts it aside gently on the coffee table. 

“You leave my granny glasses alone, I’m fucking 25,” he says as he takes them off and lays them on top of the book. “I’m just protecting my eyes, or something.” 

By now you’re more interested, though, in what Dave’s got under his jeans. You lean over and pop the fly; the zipper is old and kind of cheap, so as soon as the button’s open it practically slides itself down. It only takes a few more short pulls to reveal the goods. What you’ve learned about Victoria’s Secret is that its products are not necessarily geared toward humans built like Dave, and it shows in the way the thin stretchy cotton strains and gaps around Dave’s junk. More narrow lavender lace trims the leg holes, although when you touch it you find it’s not at all the scratchy shit you expected. 

His dick is soft now, sure, but that doesn’t last long as you stroke him through the panties. His usual briefs are a lot thicker, and even though you think the hole in front of those is pretty fun, this has its own merits, like the shiver you get out of him when your thumb brushes the side of his balls where the panties don’t quite cover him. When you glance up at him he’s just looking back with hooded eyes, hands laid on his stomach; you push his T-shirt up to the sides of his hands and trace your fingers back down the trail of yellow hair that leads back to his crotch. 

“If you like all that, wait’ll you get a load of the back, though,” Dave laughs. 

“The back?” You give him a look, and he starts to say something else, still laughing, right before you interrupt him by flipping him onto his stomach. 

“You couldn’t fucking warn me before you plant my face in the couch, dumbass?” Dave snaps, but you’re pulling his jeans off and he lifts his hips, then his knees, to help you fling them into the corner. The back is some kind of weird cross between a thong and hipster panties, and okay, so you spent a while on the site; you can identify these what with the bottom curves of Dave’s ass hanging out of them, although he still yells out _They’re cheeksters, okay, of course I had to get the shit with the dumbest name in the store!_

The stupidest and best part is that across what little back there is, the word PARTY is stamped in giant block letters. You cackle. “No shit, you got the dumbest underwear flat out, didn’t you? That ain’t ironic, that’s just you liking tacky shit.” 

“Tacky?! That’s fucking rich coming from—” He shuts up pretty quick as your hand slides in under the lettering, and then further down to pop purple cotton from between his asscheeks, squeezing as you go and leaving little red beads. 

“Dave,” you say as you spread his ass with your thumbs, “I know you showered today, right?” 

“Yeah, I ain’t nasty like that,” he says, quiet with how one of those thumbs brushes over his taint. That’s enough for you, then, and you lick your lips before you press your tongue to his asshole. He’s still got his ass up in the air and he buries his face in the dark cave made by his folded arms. Your tongue pushes against him, insistent before laving over it again. 

“I can’t have any kind of peace, in this goddamn apartment,” he huffs, and you shut up him with a bite to his ass cheek. You try to only just bruise him, but human skin is so fucking delicate, a line of red blood running down the curve of his ass. 

You’re aware, too, of Dave’s boner hanging heavy in the front of his panties, but you leave that alone, even when you hear him practically crying, begging for you to just touch his fucking cock, _you triflin’ motherfucker, I swear I’m gonna blow a nut out if you don’t goddamn touch me _. You catch him trying to angle so he can grasp it himself, trying to prop up on one arm so he can use the other, and you knock the load-bearing arm out from under him while you grab the other and twist it up behind his back. “We ain’t gonna play it that way,” you growl, just before you dive back into his ass. He’s gaping a little now, just enough for you to push your tongue into his slick asshole, and he’s pushing back into it like he’s gonna die without your mouth on his ass.__

__It’s not like you’ve never tried rimming Dave, but he’s always asked you to do it, and it’s always been you just figuring he knows what he likes and you might as well try giving it to him. You’ve gotten him off exactly once with this shit, and even that was a combined effort. But fuck, you’ve never _wanted_ to do it like this, never just fucking grabbed him by the hips and stuck your face in his ass. Something about those stupid fucking panties just fucking invited it. _ _

__“F-fuck, fuck, Gamzee, get the—get them off, I’m—” He’s trying for his crotch again, although this time with different intentions, but as far as you’re concerned that’s still not allowed, and you break away from eating him to grab him by the back of the head and shove his face into the cushion, effectively wrecking his efforts to get his underwear away from his cock. You spread his ass with both hands, claws digging in, and lick and suck with renewed vigor._ _

__He comes a few minutes later, right all over the front of his panties, sobbing your name and cursing you out as his hips jerk in orgasm. You bite his ass one more time for posterity, and when you let go of his hips they drop bonelessly. He’s red from his face all the way down to his chest and breathing hard, although he’s apparently not out of it enough to not shove at your face and make melodramatic noises of disgust when you go in for a kiss._ _

__Later on he yells at you for ruining everything as he rinses the cum out of his underwear, standing in the bathroom naked from the waist down, but you just grin and turn up the volume on Adult Swim. You could probably stand to rinse your mouth out, but it’s worth it to hold off just to blow in Dave’s breath and get an earful about your apparent ass-breath, which you’re pretty sure he’s actually making up._ _

__A week later he gets into bed in nothing but a T-shirt and a different pair of panties that just say SEXY on the ass. Neither of you sleep for the next two hours._ _


End file.
